Killing ourselves ( Part 1 )

Day 27

Hey there, I know the title is bit scary but the thing is this is one of the most important thing that we all seem to realize, hey look at me I've also realized from experience and fight and pain. The thing is, there is something behind our own conscious that actually is well killing ourselves theres a lot but I'm going to discuss two to be exact from what I learn in my past life. Grudge/hate/spite, we all have been hurt don't we, get into a fight and kick that person out of our lifes forever. Well I did, well she used to be my best friend and someone who I can blabber with. Well we were a team, but since she had a boyfriend, I felt our friendship shifted, and I started to feel irritated on how irresponsible she is and so on. I gave her chance to realize, keep reminding her over and over, till I had enough and well you guess it I explode, I was furious, it turn out into a drama, I lost my patience and well I sort of kick her out of my life, for 2 year I let that Grudge hold on to me , like I said I forgive her, but well actions speak louder than words, I didn't see purely on her goodside but all I remeber was her mistake, is that really forgiving grace. Now I experienced her same position, and you know what readers, grudge kills you not only you loose people you love, you let pride and anger get in you, that actually is killing you bringing more problems, and the scary thing is the longer the more toxic it is, the more you are killing yourself till point your gone from ur own concious. then what all we cand o is regret, and trust me reget is more painful that grudge, because it will carry on in your life. So guys lets really be honest and see what our hearts are crying for. I am so blessed that my bestfriend and I reunite, and slowly things are coming back and I want to say I love you and I'm sorry.